Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Everything happens for a reason

215.6 (note how 8 consecutive days of working out has not moved this number down)

I notice that often when something negative or undesirable happens to us, friends and family reassure us by repeating the phrase that is the title of this post: "everything happens for a reason."

I know I've had discussions with at least a couple of my friends about whether, in fact, this is the case. . . . or whether we just frame things this way in retrospect. As an example, some might say that the "reason" that things didn't work out with my ex-fiance SL and me was so that "something better" could come into my life in the form of my relationship with MM.

BUT. . . . did my break-up with SL REALLY happen so that I could meet and marry MM? Couldn't it simply be that I broke up with SL because not marrying him was a better idea than marrying him, and then eventually (and inevitably) I fell in love with someone new who just happens to be a better fit for me?

Does anything that happens to us TRULY happen for a reason?



JessiferSeabs said...

My poor head and heart have been so confused about love for the past several months that I don't even think I'm capable of answering that question.

I don't know that your breakup with SL "happened" to you. I think it was a conscious choice.

That's all I got. ;-)

The H's said...

I don't really think everything happens for a reason. BUT, I often subconsciously subscribe to this notion. I think it makes life nicer if we believe this. I do think some things might happen for a reason. Which do and which don't, who knows? Hmmmm, I guess this is why I can't find an organized religion or dogma that can accomodate all of my innate beliefs.

Land family said...

Although I don't believe we are little puppets blindly following some sort of plotted out life, I do believe that the main purposes of our life have ARE what we are supposed to be doing/living/learning, etc.

I also had a really bad first serious relatioship that went straight to hell. But I do believe that was for a reason. Now I'm married to a wonderful man, and I think I appreciate him more than I otherwise would have.

I have conflicting beliefs in case you can't tell. I do believe in christianity (for the most part), but I also believe that we come back if we don't learn whatever purpose we were sent here to do.

Anonymous said...

The spiritual side of me says that yes, things happen for a know, all part of the plan.

However, the cynic in me just thinks it's the one door opening after another closes thing.

It's all so confusing.

Cindy said...

I think that this catch phrase is designed to make people feel better about bad things that happen to them. Similarly, there is a good argument that religion exists because people fear death.

That said - what's wrong with that? We take an asprin to make the pain go away, sometimes it would go away anyway if someone gave us a placebo and told us it was asprin. So what? The pain went away.

If it makes people feel better, I think it's ok for them to believe it. Logical cynics like us are stuck not being so reassured. To quote another popular catchphrase - ignorance is bliss.