Wednesday, June 04, 2008



I am frickin' tired again today. The only thing I can figure is that the stress of working so much last month is finally catching up with me, now that I am less pressed for time.

It sometimes seems to me that I spend a lot of my life waiting. I've waited with family members trying to find out a diagnosis for various health problems. I waited months to see if my ex-fiance would/could stop drinking. I'm currently waiting to find out whether my vacation will be cancelled.

I think that after a while, waiting becomes a harder thing to bear than the outcome we dread. Once you have a diagnosis, treatment options can be discussed; reality can be faced and planned for. I know that in my situation with my ex, I got to a point where I almost didn't care whether he would or would not stop drinking: I just wanted to know which one it would be so that I could act accordingly. Ditto with waiting to find out about my vacation: once I know for sure that it will have to be cancelled, I will deal with it and move on.

So many things in life involve waiting. It is said that good things come to those who wait, but this is not always so. . . . and we all have to wait sometimes.

Is it just me who feels that even the worst outcome is sometimes not as bad as the uncertainty of waiting for an answer?


Land family said...

One of my favorite songs ever, "The waiting is the hardest part" by Tom Petty. So true!!!

Emily said...

Absolutely, waiting is the torterous part, there is nothing nothing worse than having to wait for something, because while we wait we run thru 80 million possible scenerios and ultimately the outcome is not determined by us. Whatever the outcome, it can not compare to what we've built it up to be. Hang in there, good things do not come to those who wait.