Beginning yesterday evening and lasting into late morning today, I was feeling depressed. After engaging in some self-analysis over the course of the morning--and drinking a caffe latte--I believe that the source of my funk is simply my feeling overwhelmed. A brief breakdown of what's going in my life:
- I am hella busy at work and behind on my billables for the second month in a row. Yes, I see the irony in having a lot to do and yet not billing enough hours. It's called procrastination and a lack of self-discipline, people!
- In addition to the fact that I need to bill more hours, I have to draft four motions for summary judgment in the next 6 weeks. (For those non-lawyers who read this blog, translate this into hours of research, writing, and picking through disclosed evidentiary documents for support for every fact I must write about.) Actually, #2 will end up helping me up my billables, so eventually a good thing, but more work in the short-term when I don't have time for it!
- MM and I have bought a new house and are having to arrange many things for the house: landscaping, spa, utilities, home loan, homeowners' insurance, pest control, cable/internet, new furniture
- Movers will be at my apartment to take my stuff to the new house three weeks from today--by this time of day, the stuff will be unloaded at the new house--and I have at least 3 closets' worth of crap to sort through before then so that I can decided what to pitch, what to donate, and what to move.
- The 3 closets' worth of crap doesn't even include all the other household packing that any normal person would have to deal with in the weeks before a move.
- I am definitely getting rid of about half my furniture before the move and have to decide what to do with it all. Sell on craigslist? Freecycle? Get charity to pick up?
- I need to book our wedding package in Maui in the near future if I want to have any hope of doing our wedding while we are there.
- I'm trying to exercise more regularly in an effort to lower my dangerously high cholesterol.
- I'm back on Weight Watchers trying to lose weight to lower cholesterol and look decent for the Maui trip. And I'm doing Core, which involves more shopping and cooking than usual for me.
- I have a crapload of stuff I've put off for too long, including: a thorough detailing of my car's interior (pre-paid in late May and not yet done); 50K-mile service on car (scheduled and cancelled once already); tailoring of two pairs of "summer" dress pants for work (one pair is part of a pantsuit I bought A YEAR AGO and have not yet been able to wear).
- I am off the pill and could theoretically become pregnant at any time. . . so every month I am paying much more attention than usual to my cycle.
- MM and I need to go to the jewelry store and pick my engagement ring.
- I need to schedule a holiday/engagement photo session before all the photographers' available sessions are taken.
Actually, I am getting exhausted and feeling a bit defeated just reading over this list! All of this is in addition to the usual life stuff that we all have going on: household chores, dog care, remembering friends' birthdays, keeping in touch with family. WHEW!
It's no wonder I feel as though I need a week off just to veg. BUT I'm not gonna get it any time soon, so I just have to suck it up and deal.
Not to sound all Alcoholics Anonymous-y, but I'm just gonna have to take things "one day at a time." In six weeks, life will look quite different than it does today. Time will tell how I will survive until then. ;-)