Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Why

216.6

Beginning around 4:00 yesterday afternoon, I was seized by a sudden yearning to eat something carb-laden and fatty. I'll admit that the inclination to go "off program" for a meal arose even earlier in the day. I had resisted the urge earlier in the day to visit Qdoba for their delicious nachos--which I had been eating at least 2-3 times a week prior to re-starting JC after the July 4th holiday--but the desire to eat something "bad" built and built as the afternoon progressed.

I ended up losing the battle of wills with myself and getting dinner at Chi.no Band.ido, a local Chinese-Mexican fusion place which has been featured on Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives. (I know it sounds weird, but trust me, it is fantastic!) I had a jerk chicken quesadilla, a machaca burrito, refried beans, and fried rice with more jerk chicken, and I enjoyed it tremendously. The food there are always great, but it was a particular treat after more than a week of eating healthfully again.

I have to admit, I felt a little bit like an addict as I was driving to the restaurant, which is about 15-20 minutes from my office and not really on my way home. (I have to detour 10-15 minutes off my usual route to get there.) I felt driven to get the food. It was actually kinda weird, and I don't know why I had this strong, near-irresistible yen for this particular food.

I tried several techniques which have worked in the past for talking myself out of eating this dinner: refocusing on my reasons for wanting to lose weight, planning ways to jazz up the dinner I'd had planned, reminding myself that I would be eating out this weekend, drinking extra water, taking a little walk around the office (inside; it was 109 here yesterday). None of them worked. And the desire certainly didn't stem from true hunger, as I had eaten all my planned meals and snacks for the day and spaced them appropriately and had had plenty of water.

Oddly enough, after eating this fatty, salty, carb-rich feast, the scale was down an entire pound this morning from Tuesday morning's weigh-in. Who knows why.

I am going to ameliorate last night's damage by being 100% on plan today and drinking lots and lots of water. (I drink at least 2 liters of water every day and have been trying to get to 3 liters a day since re-starting JC.) I am also going to the gym and will do cardio in addition to the weight-lifting I'd planned to burn some additional calories.

I'm not beating myself up over my slip--I'm human, and it's going to take me a year to get to a healthy weight at a reasonable rate of 1-2 lbs/week--but am perplexed about why it happened.

2 comments:

Mo said...

Girl, I slip ALL.THE.TIME. It happens. We like food! If we didn't like food we wouldn't be trying to lose weight. Right? I am not of the eat to live mentality. I live to eat! A good fattening meal can actually be good for you every now and then. It's called a re-feed. That's both physically AND mentally good for you.

Shake it off, don't be hard on yourself. You're doing great :o)

TUWABVB said...

I wouldn't beat yourself up at all! You recognized a crazing, tried to curb it and were aware of what you were doing when you satisfied it. I think you handled it correctly! If you deny it all together, there could have been much more damage.